Why you should never date a gemini man

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The gemini man is one who will leave you as emotionally fucked as he himself is. I know because I’ve been there plenty of times. He’ll tell you everything you want to hear, letting you believe you’ve found the man of your dreams, only to turn cold on you the next minute. The first time this happens, you give him the benefit of the doubt, because eventually he’ll come running back. But he’s a coward, so he won’t be returning until he feels it’s safe, meaning you’ll have to swallow all your anger and hurt and let him believe it’s all okay. And it’ll feel okay for a while because he knows how to say all the right things. The problem is that he has no idea how to stick with it. He’ll say one thing and do the complete opposite, and you can never expect him to follow through. Soon he’ll be running off again and leave you even more baffled than the first time. This is when you start doubting whether or not it’s worth it.

One of the problems with the gemini man is that he is easily influenced by others. When he’s with you, he’ll be all there, but as soon as he is with his family and friends, or even at work, it is like he vanishes in thin air. He won’t be thinking about you because he’s too busy mimicking whomever he is around. You might be safe for a while as long as those close to him love you as much as he seemed to, because then he’ll be reminded of your existence from time to time and might even send you a text message. If not, don’t expect to hear anything from him unless he wants something from you.

Don’t expect him to be there for you when you need it. You’ll need to be there for him. If you try turning to him for support you’ll be left endlessly disappointed. The best is to have no issues at all, need nothing from him and never ever criticize him, and that is why the only long term relationships he finds himself in is with emotionally dead people. If you have emotions, forget about it. He’ll fuck you so over you’ll never understand what happened.

He has a tendency to lie to you. He is a terrible liar and doesn’t even try to cover his tracks. If you confront him, he’ll act like he has no idea what you’re talking about, making you feel terribly frustrated and eventually you’ll have to choose between letting it go or dumping him completely. There’s no point in discussing the matter, he’ll have nothing of it.

He seems to have great plans for his life, but he’ll rarely get around to doing anything about it. He’ll drown himself in drugs and booze much sooner than he’ll actually admit to himself that he needs to get moving. The problem is that he keeps changing his mind and before he actually follows something through, he has other ideas about where his life is headed. In the end, he is pretty much on a standstill, even though his social and malleable character may leave you easily fooled. He’ll see the stars in your eyes and he’ll make you believe he is exactly the same, but when it comes down to it, he is nothing of the sort.

Deep down in the gemini man lie an array of emotions. That is why you might let him do his thing for a little too long. You’ll hope the wonderful man he really is will eventually come forth. But he is easily hurt and when he hurts he shuts off. When you finally realize it’s a dead end, you’ll have drained yourself by being too supportive and too accepting, and that’s when you snap. And as soon as you snap, he’ll run off and never come back. He won’t be thinking about you for a second. But if he believes you’ve forgotten him, he’ll be mad as fuck. And that’s the only thing you can do with a gemini, run before he runs away from you, delete all his contact info, never look back and leave him to stew in his own hurt feelings. At least that’s better than him doing the same to you, because he will.

So, this is what I’ve been up to lately, learning this lesson once again.

– Agathe

PS. I am sure there are plently of okay and mature geminis out there too, so don’t take my word for it.

Illustration from here.

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207 thoughts on “Why you should never date a gemini man

  1. Suzi says:

    Debbie…..my only advice is to leave it be!, we are all worth so much more!! I have finally managed to let go for good and what a relief!! Focus on you and feeling good about yourself, do things you enjoy! I find the gym very cathartic, although not everyones thing!
    ” When you leave the wrong wrong things in your life the right things start happening!”

    Nicole : well said

    Like

    • Weed says:

      Ok, so please don’t anyone attack me. I am married, very happily, however…..I have met a Gemini and I have become obsessed. I can’t get within 2 miles of “Gemini” without every cell in body spontaneously combusting. “Gemini” is also with a partner but not married. I am looking for someone to explain to me why just mere eye contact with Gemini is pure voltage. I’m Aquarius. I can’t sleep, I hear my heart beat all day and all night….if you have never known this, I can’t explain it. I really need to get “Gemini” out of my head. Any advice. I’m dying here. Oh yeah, did I mention I don’t want a long term relationship. I just desire a sexual relationship???

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      • Sherry says:

        Weed… Unfortunately I am so attractive to the Gemini it’s scary. The best sex EVER.. Been married twice and he opened a whole new meaning of orgasm. This is the part I will miss so much..It’s so over whelming in so many ways..Wish me luck

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  2. marie says:

    I cannot believe how spot on this is. I just got out of a year long roller coaster pseudo relationship with a Gemini boy. He mostly is full of sh*t and not a big deal but I made him that – believed in his potential and pumped him up, and I started to believe the hype, but none of it was true and he was never there for me when I needed support. We broke up 5x and he never came back – I always craved the fantasy of what we were and would contact him and then the reality would always surface after a month to 6 weeks and I would have to close the door again. I was so in love with who he presented in the beginning or maybe my own projection. Either way, I know a lot was my too accepting ways and wanting to believe him, but a woman knows and I learned with him I should not doubt my GOD given intuition.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Opal says:

    OK, ladies, I’m a Gemini woman and here’s the trick on how to deal with these Gemini men…

    Geminis tend to rush into relationships when they really want someone. So if a Gemini man is taking forever to make up his mind about the relationship, he doesn’t really want it. Even if you hang in there and he ends up saying yes to the relationship, you will suffer for it, because he never wanted it in the first place.

    Gemini men tend to fall for femme fatales – these are the women they typically become addicted to. Even if he marries a nice girl, it’s highly unlikely he will be truly in love with her.

    This is their MO: They want you Baaaad, until they have you fully. Once he’s captured your heart completely, he will start questioning his feelings for you. The best thing to do when this starts happening is to drop him like a scorching potato. Don’t sit around waiting for him to make up his mind. If he has any feelings for you, he will come back around, being all nosy and up in your business.

    Mine claims to love me deeply, but kept questioning our relationship. Then he went back to his ex-girlfriend. What did I do? I started dating someone else. When he contacted me, the first thing he wanted to know was if I have a boyfriend. I told him I was hanging out with someone else. Now every time he contacts me, he wants to know about me and this guy – what we did, etc. I told him to stay the hell out of my business and not to ask me anything else about it. He’s doing this because he’s conflicted and he cannot stand not being at the center of my attention. Now that he doesn’t have me like he used to, he’s jealous, though he tries to hide it.

    This is the only way to get any kind of satisfaction when a Gemini guy breaks your heart: drop him cold-turkey style and leave him forever wanting OR stick around, be his friend, but date other people and watch him secretly drive himself insane. LOL.

    Being too nice with these guys just doesn’t work. They’re bad boys at heart.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Cilla says:

      Thankyou for that comment just what I needed to hear. What a strange man mine has been. Showers me with affection, im the only one he has ever loved!!!!!! Blah blah. Gonna drop that hot cold potatoe on his arse, he aint gonna find better and he knows it. I can definitely find better, one who understands the word consistancy

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  4. Leila Melani says:

    Nicole,
    Thank you for this post! What you said was totally true! I was dealing with a gemini for several months and it was pure hell. The first few weeks he was everything and more beautiful dates, etc, but then one week he just changed. He stopped being caring, talkative, etc, and just turned cold. He was also on dating apps and talking to other girls at the same time. Eventually we messed around after the third month and I have never heard from him again. He stalks my social media but refuses to speak to me. I know that I am a very beautiful girl inside and out but he took a toll on my self-esteem after everything he put me through. It felt like it was his mission to destroy me especially after messing around with me and not speaking to me for 3 months.

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    • Nicole says:

      No offense gemini man… But you are wrong. According to mine, he was connected on an emotional level. He said he was more so with me then anyone else.
      The sad part is he squashed what I loved about him…and he slowly took whatever I was and pushed it so far down nothing was left for him either.
      Slowly, over time, he just added brick after brick until more walls formed and he hated me for the very thing he himself built.
      To give them their due, I think gemini men make great friends. I myself will never ever become emotionally invested again past friendship though. Good luck to you.

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  5. Geminiman says:

    The problem with us is the inability for us to explain how we are feeling, because we think about things other people dont even consider. To save myself a huge debate and being misunderstood ill keep my mouth shut but the things that bother me begin to build up slowly and they end up manifesting themselves in the wrong way. The best way to communicate with me is to tell me directly how you feel and what bothers you about me. As a gemini myself i aknowledge many of the negative traits that many of you have had to suffer through but it seems all of you women have one thing in common – you never actually connected with that man. You may have gotten along with him on a verbal level but dont pat yourself on the back about that because we are on that level with everyone we meet. Understanding what we feel and how we feel it is KEY. I.e. if you are upset about him not texting you, instead of complaining and giving him shit about it (which he will run away from, since the people that confide in a gemini for help with their issues are almost never limited to girlfriends or partners but also siblings and friends and even acquaintances; we burden ourselves with problems since we are problem solvers) the right way is to drop it at the right moment – when youre walking to the theatre for a movie and you pull him to the side n say “hey babe listen i know ur busy n get caught up in the moment when were not together but i feel sad when you dont text me and id like it alot if you made more of an effort, since that shows that you care”. In a nutshell you must explain clearly and in a light mood that is how you feel and what you want, and how what you are asking for will make you feel better. You must provide a valid reason for why you ask for what you do, and connect with him. Once the emotional connection is created he will never ever cheat on you or leave you. I know this because this is me

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    • Leo Woman says:

      Yes, I Can Understand This. I’m A Leo Woman That Likes This Gemini Man. And Im Really Trying To Connect With Him. His Moon Is In Capricorn And My Moon Is In Taurus. So He Can Be Emotionally Detached.. I Told Him Straight Up That I Like Him. And He Would Get Quiet. When We See Each Other. He Always Touching Me. And Being Caring, Sweet Etc.. ( Venus Cancer And Mars In Leo ) He Also Kissed Me For The First Time. Like He Meant It.. And We Had Sex ( First Time Too) I Don’t Know If It’s Just The Charm. Or If It Means He Really Like Me. He Never Text/Call Me. I Feel Like I’m The One That Half To Text/Call Him First.. I Give Him His Space And Freedom.. But I Don’t Know.. Me Being A LEO. I Want To Tell Him Deep How I Feel For Him. But Then That Will Probably Just Run Him Off. And I Show It Better Than Telling It. But I Want A Mental Connection With Him. It’s Always A Strong Physical Connection Whenever We See Each Other…

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Gemniwomen says:

    This couldn’t more true then it already is.. I’m a Gemini, my mother is and also my brother. So I know. But I fell in love with a Gemini my self. There words are so deep. There mind never stops working. I love how deep he really did think just like my self. He always wanted to be with his friends and so did I. i wanted to be alone most of the time. So did he. We wanted the same things. We came from the same city. Same school. Are problem was it would never work. We are the same people. I could love him from far away.

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  7. These stories are very similar to mine…it’s like we have all dated the same person. I was with this Gemini for 3 years and he was the absolute worst boyfriend I’ve ever had… When we first started dated he was really sweet and he was the type to tell you exactly what you wanted to hear, he would literally show me a lot of affection and buy me giftsand then he would change all of a sudden. He would have these mood swings out of nowhere and he would take it out on me. This guy had multiple friends that were girls…I didn’t trust that at all. He would have pictures of other girls in his phone. I could never keep up with his mood swings. One minute he would be loving all over me and the next he would be very distant and rude…we break up and he starts “dating”someone else. He also decided to rub that relationship in my face. After a while that relationship came to an end. He ended up trying to pop back into my life. He added me and stalked my fb and my Instagram.. he messaged me on Instagram saying that he missed means wanted to talk, he kept talking about fantasizing about me and having sexual dreams. He also talked about having old photos of me from years ago…CREEPY right? I was creeped out so ended up blocking him on all social media…these guys are not anything to play with. If you are the type to sleep around, with no strings attached. Then they are perfect for you..if you want commitment he is NOT for you! He will tell you exactly what you want to hear just get what he wants. Once he gets what he wants, he’ll get too comfortable then he’ll start doing whatever he wants. He won’t think about your feelings,he won’t care about certain things will make you feel, he’s selfish and he only thinks about himself…think about it…why do Gemini men have a hard time keeping friends?? No one likes them. They have such a bad vibe about them..It took me forever to figure him out. To notice that he was no good. They are very sneaky, so watch out. If you come across one RUN! They are only out to hurt you. They don’t care about anything that effects you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Suzi says:

      Well said and all very true as we all know now due to our awful experiences! Luckily there are some decent men in the world

      Like

    • Scorpio says:

      Very similar story here Badgalkiiii and I completely relate to his having a hard time keeping friends. I don’t mean people to hang out with but like REAL friends, the kind of friends you’re genuinely close to, the kind of friendships that take time to build and cultivate. There were people that didn’t like him actually and I couldn’t figure out why, the only “friends” that “liked” him were girls, because he always was ambiguous with most of them. But that’s not true friendship. He didn’t have true male friends, like most of my exes have, and most of the guys I know have. He even had enemies, I should have been alarmed then, but at the time I was all like trying to comfort him instead of running away. Actually gemini men are pretty pathetic.

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  8. Gg says:

    Wow yes the feminine man is charming and tells you what you want to hear. As soon as they don’t think you are paying enough or complimenting him he blows up. Doesn’t care about cutting you down though! Cuz in their mind abuse is the way .

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Meagan says:

    Every single sentence, every description, is exactly what I have been going through for the last 5 years and I’ve finally just dropped his sorry ass once and for all. Harsh words were said but I have no regrets because today was the absolute last time I will be putting up with his crap. Thank you for this post. It helps me so much to know that everything I have felt about this particular Gemini has been articulated so perfectly.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. suziemax says:

    I feel like I just came out of therapy. I hav been with a Gemini man for three years and in the last couple of months I found him at his home with a next woman. I was so in love that i wanted it to work and was willing to forgive. This only made him react even worse and looking back now I have realized that he was one one of the most selfish , lying , flirting person i had ever encountered. I am now hearing the stories of what he was always up to and now i am learning that his version of love was all fake.Let me say I am remaining his friend and I am making him jealous everytime he sees me cause they being so selfish hates when their exes are happy and moving on withut them.

    Liked by 1 person

    • CKM says:

      Bipolar narcissist moody split personality fickle two-faced it psycho gemini men. ladies be aware. Save yourself the headache and heartache. Dont fall for the sweet Charming words that will come smoothly out of his mouth. He is not your soulmate that he will claim to be. they dont NOT have souls or soulmates period point blank.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. Terri says:

    Omg every comment i red was so true. I dated two crazy moody bipolar split personality male geminis it was a real live roller coaster. I will never ride one of them AGAIN. Please ladies and gentlemen save yourself the headache and heartache RUN the other way dont look back gemini men are psychos.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Nicole says:

    If you are wondering how a Gemini man really feels… Look at his actions verses his words. Words will be sweet and his actions will never match them.
    It will always be.. I almost did this for you but because you did xyz it didn’t happen.
    If you are still confused.. And trust me it’s easy to be, as this Blogger put it in her post.. “emotionally fucked” while involved…so if you find yourself confused… Let me pass on some some advice that we told to me some time ago that I found useful.
    When you argue push him to his breaking point.. Pummel him with words whether you mean them or not… Pay attention… Whatever he says and does at that point … Is really him.
    I have been reading all along that they have the trait of never growing up and didn’t initially agree with it but I do now. They like the idea of you as long as you are not any work…

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Nicole says:

    I want to thank everyone for posting here and listening to me rant. I hope it helps someone else see things more clearly, for me it was good to vent because he has made it to where I don’t feel any safety venting without a watchful eye.
    My relationship is over. Everyone I’m sure saw that.. But I can finally say that and feel it in my chest. I’m bruised from it but.. the pain of the sting finally surpassed the sweetness of what he seemed to be. For a long time it didn’t.
    Along with all the lessons I have learned and wrote about here… I have also learned that the way someone looks doesn’t matter. They don’t have to appear the wolf to be one. Wolves don’t always drive Porsche cars and have capped teeth. Some of them wear glasses and read book’s, write pretty things and look innocent.
    I made a reverse discriminatory choice because he seemed so very unlike the others. He wasn’t.
    I would never give him the satisfaction of knowing what he did to me. I pushed him to say what I needed to hear and it hurt… And It was necessary.
    But I know I won’t ever look at him like I did before.
    Happy spring everyone.

    Liked by 1 person

    • OceanBetweenUs says:

      I’m glad you have a space where you could make friends and gain a clearer picture for what you had to do to free yourself. Happy spring to you too. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that the wind brings someone nice your way. – Aja

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    • suzi says:

      Hi Nichole, lovely to hear you are fine and have ended the rollercoaster. I ended mine Sunday after seeing a rather crude message from an ex and seeing him on a dating site too! Ive cried non stop, texted like a mad woman yet realise this is probably what he has been doing all along!! It hurts so much I just wish the pain would go away x

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      • OceanBetweenUs says:

        OMG I am so sorry to hear that! I hope you meet someone really nice who treats you the way you deserve to be treated Suzi! – Aja

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    • Suzi says:

      Nichole…I met my ex on a dating site……sure it’s not the same guy haha. I would never visit those places again I would rather be alone forever! He is back online searching for his next victim, didn’t even wait a day, mind you probably online all the time, Hey ho onwards and upwards!! x

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  14. This is almost word for word about my gemini ex, we just broke up a month ago after being together for 2 1/2 years, lived together for 2, he is very good with words and can make you feel very special, the first year of the relationship I found myself thanking God for him all the time, he was exactly what I wanted, I think that’s the part where they know how to mimic and you fall in love with how he makes you feel. He didnt have a job at the time but acted like he is full of goals and ambitions, after a while that became frustrating to me and he made little money here and there but nothing ever was stable. He managed to give flowers and do little thoughtful things that made me believe he is trying and wants to be with me for good, he was always good with words, I thought we are getting married and talked about kids all the time ( I have a kid from a previous relationship) he treated her good, helped me drive her to classes etc… Then things got worse, I became frustrated with him not having money and he finally came out that he is doing drugs ( smoking heroin) which shocked me because he looked normal and acted fine. So I just took my daughter and moved out! He never chased me, never tried to beg or change.. Etc, I know it’s not easy and I wouldn’t trust him anyway buy I was surprised that after he was acting like he is so in love with me he just left… I was very caring, supportive, paid for the most part, but he just couldn’t do anything he promised, no job, no money, on top of that drugs… At one point I was so happy thinking I found a man of my dreams but now with the pink shades off I’m shocked

    Liked by 1 person

    • suziemax says:

      Yes. They are the wolf in sheep’s clothing. They make you feel as if they are the right one for you…..perfection , you have to pinch yourself to wonder if this is a dream. You fall in love and then the perfect man becomes someone you dont even know…. Gemini men are fake , never take them to be genuine .

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Tisya says:

    Hey !!
    What do you mean by Gemini mans ….
    My Gemini man always take care for n he always think about me if i m not there n what he says he mean it n now he is has a larg business n he told me about it so what he says he mean it !!!!!

    Do u get it..
    :-\

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  16. Leelee says:

    So when you say delete everything and run before he runs away from you and he will be mad as fuck but will he eventually come back or no ?

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  17. Seanymph says:

    I’m interested in a gemini man right now who needs my help while being in the hospital. I like him a lot but from some conversations we had while i visited him, i can tell he doesn’t like anyone disagreeing with him. He basically called me a negative nancy. When i talk about something he goes quite and then finds a way to push the conversation back on himself. When i ask him certain questions about things i need to do for him while he’s in the hospital he gets an irritating tone to his voice on the phone ( which i call him out on). He never calls me. I’m the one always calling him. I have feelings for him but i think it’s best i stick to being a friend and not think or expect any romantic involvement.

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  18. Seraphim_24 says:

    Spot on… Worst part is, my man is a Gemini, with Gemini ascending and his moon is in Gemini. Kill me. (I am a Virgo with Taurus ascending, and my moon is in Virgo).

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  19. Debz says:

    They will charm you out of the trees. Mine promised me everything, very quickly. Your the one staring into my eyes,lets get married. Offered me so much support,promised to never leave me. Then wham one day of things going wrong and then packed his stuff to leave with a coldness I have never experienced. I have read these comments and I thank you all for the warnings. We are only two months in and I already can see the signs. I now am now trying to understand that it was all a con. An illusion not a reality. I feel for you woman who have spent a long time living this heartbreaking experience. I hope I have the strengh to drop this facade, guess I wanted to believe him, stability is what I need and integrity. I was happy on my own for two years, how did I not see this charmer coming. If someone seems too good to be true……

    Liked by 1 person

    • suziemax says:

      I know exactly what you are feeling. I am trying to leave mine and when i do he puts on the charm…. I am so hurt now , this up and down has been going for months i am just so emotionally drained–i need some guidance i am at a point of wondering how can someone captivate my heart with so much lies.

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    • disgeminiisebonymaw says:

      All gemini’s are swine! They should just kill themselves and die! I met this rotten conniving, stalking feces of a man. He looks like ebony maw! He tried to steal my heart and I resisted! F*#& NO!! He did all these rubbish ROMANTIC ACTS and I turned away! You Know why?! God gave me a gift called ASPERGERS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

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  20. mz kitty says:

    This is truly hilarious. Im in my tub trying not to drown. im a scorpio woman. i had a gemini woman and we grew alongside one another but this current disaster of a gemini man that im ending with is a dirty,dirty villan. i can rest assured that he will have to be my last gemini man. smh

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  21. Kiarra Pittman says:

    This is exactly what I’m going through right now. I’m a Virgo and the guy I talk to is a Gemini. The first time we hung out was HORRIBLE!!! He told me that we were gonna find somewhere to talk so he could get to know me. Well the whole time was spent with him saying insulting things then once I got mad about it, he would blame it on me. Then he would say how nice he was and make me think that I was losing my mind. When he drove me home, he changed into an entirely cruel person because his cousin was in the car with us. After I tried to cut things loose with him, he blew up my phone apologizing and saying how much he likes me. I don’t know what to do because now I’m emotionally destroyed.

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  22. Phesh says:

    The first man I loved was a gemini he mentally broke me down,the second guy I met hell he made me feel bad about my weaknesses and ran as fast as he could.They destroy your soul these gemini men its true run away from before he runs away from you.Complete rubbish aresohles.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Sorry4MyLoss says:

    Hi Ladies, I am a gay leo man and Im reading all of these heartfelt posts and I can totally identify with each of you. I recently woke-up and smelled the coffee too, I’m also dealing with a Gemini man. Like many of you, this sweet talker eased his way into my life and I graciously made him the center, for a while we had a great connection and I was happy and truly smiling, I actually felt lucky because he was so undeniably gorgeous and affectionate. For months, we were great then slowly his past began to emerge. He has a strong addiction to cocaine, his habits are very scary to witness. I was no stranger to recreational use years ago, but I grew out of it and I figured i could help him since it wasn’t a big deal for me, who was I to judge. Chile was I so wrong. He is a monster, his habit is so bad that it made me totally have a disdain for drugs and anyone who abuses it. He even sniffs BC/Goodies powders for headaches..smh.. lol. Anyway During our 2 years, he spent thousands of dollars with his so called friends on these coke binges, leaving me worried for his safety and well being at night while I slept alone in my thoughts. My self esteem was obviously low and I’ve been toiling in my head how to end this bullshit relationship, I didnt want to upset him and/or the little money he gives me towards household bills, but I’ve been so miserable and I haven’t felt any sense of encouragement, support, intimacy, I feel ugly on the inside, i picked up some weight, i feel used, stupid and again I am a Man, how on earth did I let another man, I’m sorry boy, unload all of his baggage on me and disrespect my home, the one that God who gave me. I got so tired of being disrespected with his habits, silent treatments, and whatever else he is doing. I started reading other people’s stories, particularly women who voiced their hurt and pain from men and i truly sympathize. I tip my hat off to you women for dealing with us knucklehead men. So today, I called his ass up while he was getting high with his friends again and asked if he was in a good mood, He replied yes bae, I’m Happy. So I said thats great baby and he chuckled. Then i said, since you are Happy keep your happy ass there bitch, he said why in a confused tone. i said because you are a junkie and you belong with your own kind. i changed the locks and when u ready to get your shit, we will arrange a time spot with a police escort. Then I hung up and went to work while he is stewing in his own thoughts of misery and the scare of the possibility that I’m calling the police. Maybe now one of his broke ass friends that he loves so damn much can help his punk ass out, But not me, and I encourage u ladies to run for the hills before he steals your inner light. I will never entertain a Gemini lover again, ever..

    Liked by 2 people

  24. I’m an aries man and dated a libra woman for about 9 months; we broke up. She met a gemini man and moved in with him after knowing him for 3 months. I think they have been living together for about 9 months now. I wonder if her life is a living hell right now.

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  25. Nisha says:

    This is so fucking true. I am a Taurus girl and my Gemini guy is doing the exact same thing….it’s driving me nuts !!!!!! At first he was so amazing I felt I found my mr, right and now He’s doing the whole hot cold hot cold thing and I can’t understand him whatsoever !!!! He comes real close gets all romantic and stuff and simply vanishes and it hurts so bad makes me cry till my eyes swell up

    Like

  26. V says:

    yes ladies i ran back into an old flame from 25 yrs ago it was magnetic he’s a gem male 54 and im a scorpio female 50 well we been dating hot n heavy for seven months he asked me to move in gave me the key n then stole them back in less than 24 hrs n asked me did i still have the keys i said no u took them back his lip dropped ok so how bout in the six month he gave me and std ok i left its been 27 days n he’s back making small talk im gonna go back to him b sexy as hell no sex with. Him n im gonna drain his ass without him even knowing it gems are demonic i want revenge if it had not been for this blog i would not b equipt to fuck him up like I’m sure ge has done so many other’s here comes the big payback for this asswhole bum..

    Like

  27. Nina says:

    I am 35 yo cancer dating the 40 yo successful Gemini. We’ve been in 10 months of long distance before he decided to come to visit me on July 16, my birthday. He never mentioned before that he’s taking his female PA with him even though he told me that after visiting me he’s going to go to Singapore for a medical conference. We had great times, finally made love. everything was beautiful until I got drunk and I felt that his female PA touched me. the mistakes I made was I yelled at his Female assistant, when I drunk on my birthday. I also refused to have sex with him. I didn’t remember any of the event cause I was so drunk, I only remembered that I vomit before I passed out.
    The next morning he became cold and distance and kicked me out from the apartment we rented, his PA told me that he needs to go to Singapore to attend a meeting and I better leave cause they want to finish some work before going to the airport. at first I complained cause he promised to stay with me at least for a week but he told me that he is also shocked with the change of schedule and asked me to leave soon. Before I left, I apologized directly to his PA about what happened when I was drunk and also apoloflgized to him for pushing him away when he tried to have sex with me while I was drunk. He kissed me and hugged me before I go and told me that he’s proud of me for being calm and showed dignity under the unexpected circumtances. Shortly after I go I sent him long messages to thank him for a memorable birthday and the effort he made to fly from San Fransisco to Jakarta to visit me, I also apologized for my attitude when I was drunk. I told him that I will give him space and time he needs, I told him I love him and I don’t need another man to make me whole and I will just do the things I do and keep working my way to get scholarship to USA as we’ve planned. I told him, I’ll go to US with or without him. This is the first time I made mistake and for the whole 10 months during our Long distance I showed him I am no drama queen, I am strong, independent and have qualities he needs in a partner.

    it’s been 2 days since the night. He’s going back to his country now. and still no call nor messages.
    He’s not blocking me on the apps we use to communicate though. I stop messages him and I don’t even call him not even once until now. I show him that I mean it when I said I want to give him space he needs.
    Do you guys think I still have a chance with him?

    Like

  28. Nina says:

    I am 35 yo cancer dating the 40 yo successful Gemini. We’ve been in 10 months of long distance before he decided to come to visit me on July 16, my birthday. He never mentioned before that he’s taking his female PA with him even though he told me that after visiting me he’s going to go to Singapore for a medical conference. We had great times, finally made love. everything was beautiful until I got drunk and I felt that his female PA touched me. the mistakes I made was I yelled at his Female assistant, when I drunk on my birthday. I also refused to have sex with him. I didn’t remember any of the event cause I was so drunk, I only remembered that I vomit before I passed out.
    The next morning he became cold and distance and kicked me out from the apartment we rented, his PA told me that he needs to go to Singapore to attend a meeting and I better leave cause they want to finish some work before going to the airport. at first I calmly complained cause he promised to stay with me at least for a week but he told me that he is also shocked with the change of schedule and asked me to leave soon. Before I left, I apologized directly to his PA about what happened when I was drunk and also apoloflgized to him for pushing him away when he tried to have sex with me while I was drunk. He kissed me and hugged me before I go and told me that he’s proud of me for being calm and showed dignity under the unexpected circumtances. Shortly after I go I sent him long messages to thank him for a memorable birthday and the effort he made to fly from San Fransisco to Jakarta to visit me, I also apologized for my attitude when I was drunk. I told him that I will give him space and time he needs, I told him I love him and I don’t need another man to make me whole and I will just do the things I do and keep working my way to get scholarship to USA as we’ve planned. I told him, I’ll go to US with or without him. This is the first time I made mistake and for the whole 10 months during our Long distance I showed him I am no drama queen, I am strong, independent and have qualities he needs in a partner.

    it’s been 2 days since the night. He’s going back to his country now. and still no call nor messages.
    He’s not blocking me on the apps we use to communicate though. I stop messages him and I don’t even call him not even once until now. I show him that I mean it when I said I want to give him space he needs.
    Do you guys think I still have a chance with him?

    Like

  29. Stella says:

    I came across that post googling my way to understand what was happening in my relationship. And everything is spot on! I always feel so lonely in the relationship because i feel he will never be there for me. Time to pack i guess!

    Like

  30. Babystarface says:

    I’m a cancer woman and I’m completely in love with my gemini man. Were not compatible. His kind words always bring back to life . After getting my heart broken by Leo after Leo. It’s his actions that make me cry TEARS of joy . I’ve never been treatedited so well in my life . Even though we handle life differently , the way we handle emotions our view of the world às an adventure is the same . We work different shifts . HE takes time out of his day in and out of work to let me know im on his mind . No person or zodiac is person is perfect you have to complete you and open yourself up to mature love.

    This was obviously written by someone with a broken heart .chill people .

    Like

  31. Maryam says:

    Thank you guys for sharing your stories. Last night I broke up wit my Gemini. We were together for 2 months. After our first date he was talking marriage. I said I would believe it when I saw it. He shared all these stories of women mistreating him. I felt bad for him but also we clicked so well. I’m an Aquarius. I am very logical and that is probably the reason that the first time he made me cry. Which is last night I have left him. Blocked him from social media, my phone. All of that. For three days straight he was stringing me along making plans than not calling me to tell me that the plans are canceled. It pissed me off and made me feel like he didn’t respect my time or feelings. Which from reading this I see he doesn’t. For a moment I felt like I might have over reacted but this post proves one should always trust their instincts. I will leave him where he is and pray for the next victim.

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Cat says:

    My Gemini Man story – Much younger than me but won’t leave me alone and I have not pushed for any commitment. Most of the relationship has been conducted by him over text! Lots of flirting and then forgetting to reply back to a question I asked. Then comes back two weeks later. We hooked up once and then many months later again. Here is how it went:

    He finally asked me to spend a weekend with him and go to his DJ gigs with him (and didn’t cancel on me). I thought he was afraid to be seen with me around his dumb friends. He makes all these sexual innuendos before I get there and says he wants to cuddle if nothing else.

    When I get there, he is all involved in his DJ set. I fall asleep on his couch. I wake up to him hiding in the doorway in the shadows of his room watching me sleep. He backs up and goes in his room. I walk in there and call his name. He pretends to be asleep. I ask him where he wants me to sleep and he says it doesn’t matter, so I crawl into bed with him and he doesn’t even touch me. I go back out on the couch after a while because I am getting such a bad vibe.

    The next morning I call him on his shit and he says his mind was on his move he has coming up and he’s sorry. I say we can be friends but I need him to also stop sending me these flirty texts because of all the mixed messages and it makes me feel bad. He seems super humbled and nice and still wants me to go to his gigs with him. The rest of the day there are many small irritable little tantrums going on over small things. I am getting a bad vibe. On the way to his gig, he is super irritable. I am driving ( because he doesn’t have a car) and he’s making me nervous telling me what to do and even yells at my dog for sitting on his pocket as he tries to get his cell phone.

    I am so frazzled by the time I get to this gig, I head straight for the bar while he chats up his friends. By the time I go over there, he is ignoring me and chatting up some other woman. He pretty much doesn’t talk to me or come sit with me the whole time. Then after his gig, he says he wants to take me to a park overlooking the city and I am thinking this is where he is going to throw me off of a rock somewhere, but I’m curious by now, so I go.

    He proceeds to seduce me and since we have amazing chemistry, I sleep with him and the next day at the next gig, he pretty much ignores me in front of his friends and I’ve been kind of done with him every since. Nearly a whole year of mind games and mixed messages and I had such a crush on him. But I realize I can’t go there with him ever again. I cannot put myself in a situation with him like that ever again. Because we are in the same social scene, and I will have to see him enough, I am trying to do the slow, polite fade out. Because he is so inaccessible anyway, I am sure he will figure it out and forget me eventually, but in an entire year, he doesn’t seem to be able to just leave me alone either.

    The one thing where I really should have left him off was when he finally got around to telling me he’d like to spend more time with me, invited me up there and then canceled, telling me a friend of his (who happened to be a she) needed a place to crash. I live four hours away and was on my way somewhere else. I ignored his texts after that until he finally called me for the first time ever( didn’t leave a message) and then I respsonded finally to one of his texts and had this whole other experience.

    I don’t know how I did this to myself. Not enough action living in a small isolated mountain town and I guess and I always had a crush on him. However, he is gaining so much weight and his diet is so bad and I realized he doesn’t even have a nice spirit or a good heart and I’m just done. I feel like an idiot for all this. He’s a freak with a lot of weird problems I don’t need to deal with. Multiple personalities and practically schizoaffective, but can sure turn on the social charm when he wants to.

    If you want a good laugh, go read the Gemini section in a book called, “How To Spot A Bastard By His Star Sign” – I couldn’t stop laughing in agreement.

    Like

  33. Fuckedoverbyagemini says:

    I can’t believe I have just read all of this. I am currently going through all of the above with a Gemini man. I ended up googling this, as I just couldn’t understand what is going on with our relationship. Luckily we are fairly new in our relationship, but all of the above describes our relationship perfectly. I got too invested in this man way too quickly, he said all the right things, he was perfect, beautiful. But as soon as I’ve given him what he wanted he has gone distant, cold. I truly felt this man could have been the one, however reading the above I can see exactly where this is going to go, and I can only be grateful that we have not been seeing each other for that long. I have already shed tears over this man because of how he deals with things. It will be hard for me to let go as I still view him in that ‘first impression’ light, but I have to let this go. Everyone else describes perfectly how our relationship is going and I can only see that I am going to get messed over. Stay away from Gemini’s if you have any kind of heart people, seriously. Such beautiful people, but with hearts of sh&t. If anyone is reading this hoping to ‘cure’ your Gemini man… please just let him go. Save your heart.

    Like

    • OceanBetweenUs says:

      That’s weird, I don’t remember deleting any comments yesterday? I delete comments if I think they’re obnoxious, rude or condescending to our audience. As long as it’s none of the above, you should be good. Try posting again! Thanks! – Aja

      Like

      • Weed says:

        astrology says you are supposed to be direct. When I was, lol, made a direct (verbal,phone) sexual advance……I have a feeling Gemini will never speak to me again. Gemini went quite on the other end and ask “can I call you back on this number?” No call, and when I tried to apologize, Gemini said, your ok….I wanted to call, just haven’t had time. Eye contact with Gemini is pure voltage!! When we hug, every cell in my entire body wants to self combust…..now I’m afraid I have ran Gemini off. I’m An Aquarius by the way. ???

        Like

      • Nicole says:

        Seriously just run.
        They are not what they seem and I’m thinking if ever a sign was collectively a pack of men who need meds.. These men are.
        Absolutely nuts.

        Liked by 1 person

  34. aquaseanotes says:

    So glad I found this page. I am a Leo woman and for some reason I attract Gemini males all the time. Maybe they like me because they can see that I am a pushover with a big heart (a Leo). I have so much fun talking with them, but I am beginning to see the pattern, which is that they are all talk and no substance. They can say anything but not really feel it, or mean it, and sometimes forget later. I have amazing conversations with them but it doesn’t seem that they have the depth of feeling that I do. It’s all theory to them, or something they read or heard somewhere, and they just repeat it. What others have said about them mimicking people is SO TRUE!! They adapt to their situation and they act however they have to act to make others “like” them, but really , they can’t actually connect with other people beyond the talking part because they have no feelings and they don’t emotionally connect with others. They can have amazing conversations with others, but there is no real emotional connection and NO TRUST. If you trust a Gemini, you are doing something very foolish, and you will soon find out that they are UNTRUSTWORTHY because they can change their mind about you really quickly. As a Leo who is very loyal and caring about others, dealing with any kind of Gemini eventually makes me frustrated and sad because Geminis are so selfish and flighty. They can “be your friend” for years, and then suddenly for no apparent reason, decide they don’t like you anymore and go cold on you.

    The Geminis commenting here who say that Geminis have emotional extremes, I think that’s not totally right — Geminis have extremes of only 2 “emotions” — being happy, fun, bubbly, friendly and talkative, and being totally the opposite of that, which is cold, distant, MEAN, cruel, selfish and talking trash about other people. Those are the 2 extremes or the 2 sides of the Gemini.

    My sister is a Gemini and growing up with her our family would always have to say, why is she so mean, why does she say such nastry and cruel things about people for not very good reasons? Yet at other times she could be very fun and say so many witty things that were funny, and it seemed like she was friendly. But she is not the type of person who is “NICE”. Geminis are NOT caring people. They don’t use their hearts at all, they only use their minds. They are extraordinarily SELFISH. Just like the wind, whatever direction they feel like going in they just go in that direction and dont’ care who they leave behind or who they hurt. They don’t apologize either. If they do apologize to you, they’re only saying what they know you want to hear. Trust me I know ,growing up with my Gemini sister, she never wanted to apologize for anything and would just say things to smooth things over.

    Also I have noticed that Gemini men rarely have male friends, they have tons of female friends who they usually trying to sleep with. Gemini males and Gemini females are both rather androgynous. The men are not overly masculine and they often have a lot of feminine habits and they won’t “man up” or do manly things like protect a woman, or make her feel safe. They don’t look after women. The Gemini women are equally selfish, and they may have many masculine habits and ways of thinking that they don’t show immediately. As others have said, they are beautiful people, but very cruel and selfish and cold. And they HATE when you disagree with them, they always want to be right about things and tell others the way things are, like they are some kind of professor.,

    Like

  35. aquaseanotes says:

    Agathe you described them so eloquently. I wanted to add also that I also noticed the Gemini men I meet are not doing very much with their lives, but they are always talking and acting like they are going to do something productive, very soon.

    People say that Geminis are really quick, but the way they move through life is actually slower than the other signs. This is because a Gemini is so shallow, and flighty, that they never stick with anything for long enough for it to develop, and they don’t make commitments to things because they are always running off in a different direction. This is why the Gemini men are like Peter Pan, and they look and act like little boys, and refuse to grow up. They don’t stay with anything for long, or with any partner for long. And even if they are with someone for years, that relationship never goes “deep”, and never changes, it’s always just a surface relationship full of empty talk, and lacking any real emotional depth of feelings or commitment. I have noticed that it’s actually hard to “get to know” a Gemini because they always seem to be changing, but really they are always THE SAME – that is, they are very shallow, surface people who have no substance and they are always talking, but if you look at their actions, they are always THE SAME. just selfish people who never move forward in life and never mature. Well, they do mature, but it takes them YEARS and years to finally reach a point that many other signs reach much earlier on. I have seen Gemini men who are in their 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, and they still behave like boys. They may even get married, but they are still the same shallow person they always were. I feel bad for anyone who marries a Gemini, because that would be such a shallow relationship. You could be with them for years and never feel like they actually care for you or really appreciate or know you. They are like parrots, or butterflies, or little puppies who are always distracted by something new, and always chattering away. How can anyone feel any security from such a personality?

    Like

    • Scorpio says:

      A woman i know just left a 60+ year old gemini man after 40 yrs of marriage and three kids. The guy NEVER grew up, he once made a lot of money out of sheer luck and very easily + a bit of fame and basically he lived off that for the rest of his life. Other than that: immature, unstable, irresponsible, selfish, always smoking pot even at 60. she could never count on him. even the people here claiming that they have successful relationships with a gemini man i don’t believe them, give it some time and the true gemini will surface. They’re a fucking nightmare and it will come up sooner or later. Gemini women are different though, I find most of them to be decent people.

      Like

  36. aquaseanotes says:

    I have also noticed the hidden drug usage that Geminis do so well, a Gemini I dated looked so innocent and normal, but was doing some of the craziest drugs in secret. Found out about that later.

    Also noticed Gemini men come on really strong in the beginning and seem to adore me, but then suddenly at some point become cold and distant and seem not interested anymore, cancelling plans last minute, with no apologies, going MIA with no explanations, then lies to cover it up. But string me along. Once they get you where they want you, then they start to use you. The charming person you saw you first met them is gone. They are like vampires ! Dead on the inside, and will use you for everything they can!

    And what is with all these Gemini men living with their parents or relatives for so long? And they are so disrespectful to their family when they can get away with it, and talk trash about them behind their backs!

    Like

  37. Nicole says:

    I think the bottom line is… when something is important to them it shows and when it’s not, that shows too. It’s the knee jerk reactions that matter… What do they do when they have to choose? What’s the immediate response? When making a decision about who gets their attention on a holiday… Important date… When a choice just has to be made.. When let’s say one person has to be upset.. Is it always you? What do they they themselves choose? I mean without coercion.. Without arguing…
    It’s Not… what do they say when things are on the upswing… When your lying in bed making plans for the future.
    Today is the future. Remember that.

    Liked by 1 person

  38. Theresa says:

    Wow!! I am a Cancer and was married to a Gem for 19 years and had two children. I devoted my whole world to him. We only knew of each other when we were kinda set up one night night on a dinner date. This date lasted for four hours talking at the dinner table. We never kissed good night but the next day he brought a huge bouquet of flowers to my work. That night we made love and the next he moved in with me. I got pregnant almost immediately and he was unhappy with his job but worked. Three months in we had a huge fight and possibly the major issue was my hormones. Anyway, I moved into my folks place with no contact for three solid weeks and all of a sudden out of the blue he calls and I get the “I love you and need you” song and dance. Long story short, we were drifting further and further apart but I was so blindly in love with him that I never saw it. We never talked unless it was about the kids or superficial stuff. Sex became so obsolete that I didn’t miss it anymore and was never put “in the mood”. He started an afair with his jr high sweetheart and I found out because he used our debit card to pay for the room. She left a 23 year marriage and him a 19 year marriage to start over. Anyway, it wasn’t until we separated that I learn how vile he could be. How mean and hateful and cold. Six months after our divorce he married her.

    Moving forward six years, I reconnect with a high school friend that I hadn’t seen in 30+ years even though we were Facebook friends for many years. He knows my family due to the small town and schools we went to. He was always very quiet on Facebook. Up until recently and we stated liking and commenting on each other’s posts. Then he sends me an open “hello sunshine” for all to see. We exchange numbers and talk almost non-stop for about three weeks. Text kisses were sent throughout the day, calling me his girl and calls became a daily thing abeit getting shorter and shorter as the days went by. Always with a promise of I’ll call you after I eat or get home, etc. but never does. He asked for current photos of me that hasn’t been on Facebook or no other man has seen. I sent him two with the agreement he would send me at least one in return…still don’t have one. I did send him a sexy picture and that same night we sexted but all of a sudden during this time he disappeared on me and then the next morning claimed his phone died. That’s when the daily texts started slowing down and the response time became several hours if at all. He claims he has a new phone now so I guess he can’t use that excuse again. I tried calling and texting him that whole weekend with little or no response and then Sunday he had to drive to Atlanta and was tagging other girls and posting like crazy sending them kisses and calling them baby girl but couldn’t find a second to say hello to me. I ignored him and didn’t respond to any of his post that he posted on Sunday. Then late Sunday after he was in his hotel he called. Guess what?? I didn’t answer and he knew I was there because I was on Facebook. The next day I got a text while on my way to work. He wanted to know if I was mad at him and I said no, which I wasn’t, I was extremely hurt. Anyway, I told him that I was giving him his space and he told me we were good. He is so wishy washy that I can’t take it. He knew I didn’t have anywhere to go during Huricane Matthew and only half heartily said I could come to Atlanta if I needed to. Shows how much concern he had for me. At this point he text or calls at least once daily but I need stability and consistency. As intuitive as Cancers are, I know he’s been with other women over the last two to three weeks. I will keep him at a safe distance and be social media friends but I am not going to let this go any further. I refuse to allow him or any man do me like my ex husband did.

    Geminis are the devils in sheeps clothing. Smooth talkers and social but cold and flaky. Thanks for listening to my story. T

    Like

  39. Nicole says:

    You know I am attached to the comments here, meaning, each time one goes up I get a notification. Sometimes I read and don’t respond but there are times the posts hit such a nerve that I can’t not say something.
    Has anyone else felt emotionally abandoned… Even when the Gemini in question hasn’t left?
    I generally get actual abandonment in my own history with mine but sometimes I see he attempts to console me. Even if in those times though, there is something about the way they respond that feels like plastic. Like they are trying to appear a certain way so they go through the motions.
    I can’t explain it… I haven’t ever felt anything like it before.
    Mostly though, they swing from hot to cold and if you stand back you can see you will always end up feeling alone.
    Also they seem to get you crazy then use those situations to reverse blame when they cheat. And they will cheat.. Regardless of what you do. But will always make you feel as if you pushed them.
    Its a sad story whenever you love a Gemini.
    It’s best to rely on them for nothing… Truly.

    Like

    • Allgeminiedup says:

      Yes … yes … and yes – every word, every experience … echo’ing everyone’s sentiment – without a fail is sounds like the same person having the same effect over and over and over again … … we should start a support group (sorry – misplaced sense of humour)

      Like

    • aquaseanotes says:

      yes, I did experience emotional abandonment while in a “relationship” with Gemini men. it mostly is because anytime I showed any emotion, he would go cold. Even if he was sitting there pretending to listen to me talk, even if I was crying and he was there with me, I felt that he did not care at all and had no comprehension of what real emotions feel like. It’s like they themselves have no emotions, so when another person expresses emotions, they don’t know what to do. So that feels like abandonment, because they sit there and do nothing whenever their woman feels any emotions.

      Like

  40. A. says:

    Wow… thank you for this. For the post and the comments. Reading all of this has been quite cathartic for me.

    My experience is very similar to all of what has been written here. It is only that I simply could not believe what was happening to me until I read this.

    I’m what you could consider a relationship idiot. In my 33 years I have only been in 2 relationships. I have many friends but have always found it difficult to find that special bond with another human being, and being the classical romantic idiot that I am, I can’t be with someone I don’t feel that special bond with. I also have had much emotional loss and grief in my life, which is why I had decided not to risk it altogether.

    Until last year, when I met the Gemini. Exactly as has been described here, he told me all the right things. Promised me the world. I told him exactly what state of heart and mind I was in, that I was not interested in anything other than a proper and stable committed relationship, that I was trying to live a peaceful life healing my past wounds and could not afford another heartbreak. He swore to me that he would dedicate himself to making me happy and helping me heal. And so he chased after me until I gave in, took the risk and said yes.

    For the first few month I experienced absolute perfection in the relationship. He gave me things I had never had before in my life. He made me believe that he was my soulmate, that we were made for each other, that he would never leave my side.

    This was right until the first real life challenges started showing up… I had some health problems, and wasn’t my usual positive self all the time. We started having constant frictions… at the peak of my illness he basically deserted me in the worst possible way. But stupid as I was, I accepted responsibility for his behavior. I blamed my own insecurities, but at the same time I was constantly questioning my own behavior. I loved the person so much, I was happy to be with him, what was it then that was causing my burst-outs? Why was I agitated and insecure? For a long time I blamed myself for being “too hard” on him….

    After my illness passed I went after him, and we got back together, as he made a point of how much he loved me and had been worried about me… and I believed that! In the months that followed I did everything I could to make him happy, stupidly feeling guilty for what had happened before. But then he kept playing the emotional yoyo with me, always having one foot out of the door, never properly committing, blowing hot and cold… one day he introduces me to his parents and swears eternal commitment, next day it feels like he is more in a relationship with some friend of his than me… after making a million promises every day and breaking all of them 24 hours later, eventually I gave up, told him about how irresponsible and horrible his behavior had been, and ended things.

    This was a month ago, and broke me to a million pieces. My health received a huge hit, my illness came back… angry as I was at his behavior, I still continued feeling guilty and blaming myself…But then something happened that opened my eyes. I discovered an email communication between a jealous ex and this guy, for reasons I still don’t understand. I can’t begin to figure out how this happened… but what matters is what he had written. The nonsense that he had written about me, the lies… he had basically written the opposite of what happened, he had pretended as if I was the one who originally chased after him, I was the one who had gone “crazy” and “dumped” him…. this was horribly painful, and eye opening. And then I finally read this article…. and now there’s a lot I see.

    I now see that all of those things that he said and did to get me to be with him, get me to believe that he was the one, could in fact be nonsense. Yes, it’s very stupid of me, but at first I could not believe that a human being can be so deceptive… but after reading all of this, I see that it’s the regular business for the Gemini man! I now realize that this was never my soulmate. That the reason I had those burst-outs and feeling insecure, is that he was not treating me right in the first place and I kept forgiving him, making him excuses, telling myself that it was because he had no experience with relationships and that he was worth it.

    Now I know that he was never capable of properly committing. That he came after me so hard because I was a challenge, because I was the girl who was saying no to everyone. And despite everything I told him, despite the promises he made, he played that same game with me and left me when he finally fully had me. I realize now that I should have paid attention to those small things that simply didn’t fit into the image he was creating of himself for me… the image of a saint.

    As has been mentioned, I have been left emotionally fucked up. From the people who have more experience with this, I welcome any advice as to how to get over this emotionally. Also… here’s the million dollar question I’m asking myself now…. how do I not let myself get fooled like this the next time? How do you “know”?

    Like

    • Nicole says:

      A.
      Wow. I completely sympathize with your post and your words were extremely familiar. Especially the personal outbursts and then blaming yourself. The no real commitment.. The yoyo… The dealing with him running when you need support.
      As far as your question…
      I am wondering if this is like buying a car. If maybe the high end sports car that pulls you in because the feel look and test drive is so amazing at the dealership.. Is the same car you are regretting after things go wrong.. The expense too high.. The insurance.. The payments.. Unbelievable hit to your income when repairs are needed… Suddenly, the ride doesn’t feel quite the same.
      You almost look back and say.. That Explorer would have gotten me through blizzards.. Been affordable.. Comfortable… And in retrospect the ride was pretty good too.
      Maybe instead of something that creates a rush of fever is what we should avoid and what is cozy like a big sweater in the fall is what we should look for.
      Just a thought.

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      • A. says:

        Hi Nicole,
        Thanks a lot for you response… actually your comments have been among the most educational I read here, so thank you for that.

        Yes, I agree completely with what you are saying… What really boils my noodles is that I thought that was exactly what I was doing with this relationship! Given how afraid I was of making a mistake and getting hurt, I thought that I took things slowly and carefully, and developed a good idea of who he was first. I took my time before saying yes to him, I asked all the hard questions, I looked into his family, his history, his life…. And I was led to believe that he was exactly that, the simple nice guy who isn’t a player, who is safe and caring, who doesn’t have much experience and doesn’t quite know what to do around the opposite sex. The one with the religious commitments and the moral code, the hardworking one, and so on….. Turned out to be the absolute opposite of all of the above.

        Sadly when I did eventually say yes to him, I really meant it. I allowed him into every aspect and detail of my life, and now I don’t know how to get rid of of hist footprint allover my life….

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      • Nicole says:

        A.
        Yeah in retrospect you are correct. I did make a choice based on the fact that he seemed so different. He seemed to be very bright.. Educated in a way that was right in line with what I find attractive(literary) … A little offbeat.. A reader who pretty much seemed to keep to himself and very romantic.. I would say a bit scatter brained and almost awkward.
        I found him truly endearing because of all that. No flash to him at all. I thought that he seemed safe and at the same time engaging. He was way more one then the other.
        However… I also see way at the start he telling me so much that pulled me in and I see clear signs that things may not be what I thought.. And I ignored them. I Def wanted to ignore them.
        They have a way about them that sort of makes you feel crazy. So that makes me act crazy lol
        One thing for sure..
        I never felt secure in any way shape or form.

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  41. I am very happy that I finally got rid of the Gemini who was playing mind games for over a year. He was truly a schizoid,borderline manipulative wreck with charisma and charm but a black heart in the end. Thank you for writing this Once I got free, and after a month or two, i started to feel better. I still miss the flirty text and the two times only we actually got together and had intimacy, but the rest of it was a psychological nightmare that he didn’t care about at all. What a messed up ass clown. I hung in there too long as you write bout. Thank you! Now I am starting to see an even younger man who is a Leo like me and he’s so much different – spends time with me, can finish a conversation on text, cuddles like he doesn’t have serious issues with showing affection, and is caring. No more un-evolved Geminis for me.

    Like

  42. Julie says:

    Wow. I have only had two Geminis in my life, both of them exhibited the same flaky characteristics which made me feel insecure, so it never blossomed into anything more long term. The first one ignored my texts and calls and I have never heard from again. The second one started by treating me the same as the first, ie making plans and then cancelling at the last minute with some excuse. I didn’t let this develop into something more even though I wanted it to… It was amazing how similar the two acted. There is just a lack of respect and constantly looking for the next best thing round the corner. It’s too bad because they are lots of fun to hang out with, but they are just too superficial. Thank you for this article, I am sad today because the second Gemini clearly is just not that into me, but reading this makes me feel better.

    Like

  43. OverIT says:

    Wow! I just dumped my Gemini jerk after a year. He’s a recovering drug addict and has 2 years clean but did over 30 years of drugs. I knew him in high school but ran from him because he was such a bad boy and I was complete opposite. He approached me through FB, we talked on the phone and he asked me out. He actually picked me up from the airport when I arrived back from a business trip and we went to a restaurant. The guy fed me all the charm and yes, I fell for it like an idiot. He actually treated me well for a while and was most of the time a gentleman (open all doors, hold my hand, etc.) He would introduce me as his future wife (I was skeptical) and would always tell me how much he loved me and he couldn’t believe I was the one. His parents absolutely love me as I them, but they have one screwed up son. He was so emotionally detached it wasn’t funny. Oh, he loved to talk but it was only about him and his struggle to stay clean, supposedly how great he was with sex (I told him no sex without marriage…didn’t want a relationship based on just sex), how many girls he screwed back in the day, and it just goes on. I put a stop to that quick! I like when he would say he had a great life and I would look at him and say, how do you know, if you were always messed up with drugs?? He didn’t like that much but it was the truth. The more I was with him, the more self-centered, selfish and egotistical jerk he became. He really thought he was it. The only time we really argued was about one of my 4 dogs that didn’t like him. She is also a rescue and was abused by a man. So here it is……he told me he would never come back to my home because of my dog. I had enough…told him I was not giving up my dog for him and asked him why was it expected for me to conform to his life such as his addict recovery friends, his disgusting filthy house which belonged to his parents and always supporting him when he couldn’t conform to my dog that I dearly loved…..like he loves his recovery addict friends. I finally blew up and told him then this relationship is over and I grabbed my stuff and left with telling him he was a selfish POS and he didn’t deserve me. It’s been 3 weeks and not a word from him, but he hasn’t removed our pictures on FB…..what’s that all about??? I unfriended him because he chose to not let me see his post. Yes, I’ve been sad and seriously do not understand what happened, but I deserve much more and not settling for this POS. All I can it’s his loss as I’m a good, loving, supportive, successful person. Thanks for this to remind me that he was definitely Mr. Wrong.

    Like

  44. Elise says:

    WHY COULD’NT I HAVE KNOWN THIS 2 YEARS AGO. This is beyond correct. They literally don’t know what to do when you snap. Ladies stay away and never look back. I have a baby with one and I’m sorry but he will never see us again. Can’t deal with it.

    Like

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