Why you should never date a gemini man

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The gemini man is one who will leave you as emotionally fucked as he himself is. I know because I’ve been there plenty of times. He’ll tell you everything you want to hear, letting you believe you’ve found the man of your dreams, only to turn cold on you the next minute. The first time this happens, you give him the benefit of the doubt, because eventually he’ll come running back. But he’s a coward, so he won’t be returning until he feels it’s safe, meaning you’ll have to swallow all your anger and hurt and let him believe it’s all okay. And it’ll feel okay for a while because he knows how to say all the right things. The problem is that he has no idea how to stick with it. He’ll say one thing and do the complete opposite, and you can never expect him to follow through. Soon he’ll be running off again and leave you even more baffled than the first time. This is when you start doubting whether or not it’s worth it.

One of the problems with the gemini man is that he is easily influenced by others. When he’s with you, he’ll be all there, but as soon as he is with his family and friends, or even at work, it is like he vanishes in thin air. He won’t be thinking about you because he’s too busy mimicking whomever he is around. You might be safe for a while as long as those close to him love you as much as he seemed to, because then he’ll be reminded of your existence from time to time and might even send you a text message. If not, don’t expect to hear anything from him unless he wants something from you.

Don’t expect him to be there for you when you need it. You’ll need to be there for him. If you try turning to him for support you’ll be left endlessly disappointed. The best is to have no issues at all, need nothing from him and never ever criticize him, and that is why the only long term relationships he finds himself in is with emotionally dead people. If you have emotions, forget about it. He’ll fuck you so over you’ll never understand what happened.

He has a tendency to lie to you. He is a terrible liar and doesn’t even try to cover his tracks. If you confront him, he’ll act like he has no idea what you’re talking about, making you feel terribly frustrated and eventually you’ll have to choose between letting it go or dumping him completely. There’s no point in discussing the matter, he’ll have nothing of it.

He seems to have great plans for his life, but he’ll rarely get around to doing anything about it. He’ll drown himself in drugs and booze much sooner than he’ll actually admit to himself that he needs to get moving. The problem is that he keeps changing his mind and before he actually follows something through, he has other ideas about where his life is headed. In the end, he is pretty much on a standstill, even though his social and malleable character may leave you easily fooled. He’ll see the stars in your eyes and he’ll make you believe he is exactly the same, but when it comes down to it, he is nothing of the sort.

Deep down in the gemini man lie an array of emotions. That is why you might let him do his thing for a little too long. You’ll hope the wonderful man he really is will eventually come forth. But he is easily hurt and when he hurts he shuts off. When you finally realize it’s a dead end, you’ll have drained yourself by being too supportive and too accepting, and that’s when you snap. And as soon as you snap, he’ll run off and never come back. He won’t be thinking about you for a second. But if he believes you’ve forgotten him, he’ll be mad as fuck. And that’s the only thing you can do with a gemini, run before he runs away from you, delete all his contact info, never look back and leave him to stew in his own hurt feelings. At least that’s better than him doing the same to you, because he will.

So, this is what I’ve been up to lately, learning this lesson once again.

– Agathe

PS. I am sure there are plently of okay and mature geminis out there too, so don’t take my word for it.

Illustration from here.

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176 thoughts on “Why you should never date a gemini man

  1. Amy says:

    I can’t believe I actually found a web page full of women with similar experiences in a Gemini man.

    My story is a little different in a way that I had a FWB relationship with a gemini man who was also in a long distance relationship. I have been single for a long time and just wanted casual sex for a little while. He was very passionate and I loved how he made efforts to satisfy me. Soon he started relating me as his friend, hanging out for coffee and dinner a few times. He would constantly sext me and complain about how bored he is about his current long distance relationship. All of these made me feel special and also thought that he might breakup with his girlfriend for me.

    When he knew that he had me, everything changed. He became a cold monster who stopped calling or hanging out with me, wouldn’t even reply to my texts. When confronted he would act surprised and tell me that everything is fine. I was confused, lonely, angry, craving for his attention. I let go of things only to gain his company, lost my self respect in the way. Basically got really emotionally fucked up!

    I am slowly regaining myself from a year long emotional abuse, never will I ever date a gemini man again. I am so happy I found this page and could personally relate to each one of you.

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  2. Allgeminiedup says:

    Good grief … anyone in favor of a Gemini ?? Are they really THAT bad – would love to here from more Gemi males.

    For my part – there’s a reason I’m reading this …

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  3. Sam says:

    So, I just have to weigh in. This is utter nonsense. I was certainly far more reckless in my youth than I am now, at mid 50’s, but your blanket shaming of all Gemini men feels like a smear from the source. I was married to a Sagittarius, God rest her. I never felt the need to remarry — generally for lack of good prospects. I raised two children as a single father. I never found in myself any lack in purpose, drive, or persistence. Perhaps some self-scrutiny is in order to figure out why you are picking the poor examples of manhood, Gemini-hood and otherwise responsible ‘person-hood’ (if you will). There are many solid, sound people out there.

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  4. My Asshole Gemini Boyfriend says:

    This is actually dead on. This is how my on again, off again boyfriend is. He is a piece of shit, yet, I can’t seem to move passed him. He tells me he wants to marry me and that he wants to go to therapy to fix his fucked up head and then two seconds later, he acts like I am nothing to him. I stopped talking to him and continued to do my own thing, only for him to come running back. I am so angry– all I ever wanted was for me and him to get married and be happy together… but he can’t get his shit together, he listens TOO MUCH to his family and friends, has an unhealthy relationship with his family, they are primarily the reason he is so fucked up, because they are equally fucked up. I just don’t know why I cannot move passed him. I am so much better than he is, yet, it seems like we are bound to each other. I just wish he would realize that he’s losing me.

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    • Deborah says:

      Firstly I want to tell you that you are not bound to him. The word in itself is very disempowering. My heart goes out to you, I have been through the whole on, off coldness, love bombing phases myself. I have now left mine and it was hard, but no contact was the only, only way forward. These men will manipulate you as soon as you see them. What helped me was to look at the cycle of abuse and narcissism. I found mine ticked all the traits of a narcissist. There are many videos on line. They are a dual sign and will never stay constant, so give up thinking they ever will, sorry but give that dream up.. They use hooks… To reel you in and when they have you they throw you back in the pond. Then when, They, are ready will check the line to see if you are still hooked. If your nit they will love bomb you and then do it again. Un hook yourself and swim free. Think long term not short term fixes to avoid the enevitable pain. I am feeling so much better now, infact now he actually makes my stomach turn

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  5. love-lost says:

    i am writing this post with all heartfelt sincerity, if you are a woman who has deep emotions, takes relationships seriously and loves with all of your heart..please i am begging you please stay away from a gemini man. these cold hearted, emotionless, manipulative, conniving, spaced out zombies will take your heart and rip it all to pieces and stomp it in the ground and keep it moving like you never even existed even after what you thought was a long term committed devoted relationship. these selfish childish men with the attention span of a kindergartner will have you mentally screwed and emotionally scarred to the depth of your soul to the point you will think you are losing your mind. please dont ever have a child by a gemini man, these irresponsible, immature heartless monsters will even turn their back on their own children with absolutely no remorse at all. gemini men play mind games with you, ignore you, neglect you, use you, abandon you when you never saw it coming, never try to argue with a gemini man or express your feelings or pain you feel to him they dont give a damn and will ignore your ass like you dont even exist. most gemini men are down low gays as well, they are never satisfied they dont take emotions or love serious so its easy for them to sleep with other men and lie about it and they have the most darkest secrets, usually drug addicts on the low as well. its so much more i can say but why bother. fuck gemini men that species should be dealt with at birth! ladies stay the fuck away from a gemini man and this is for your own good and your mental and emotional well being.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sherry says:

    Love it… Again you hit the point hard right to the point.. The funny part is I have joked so any times on the ass issue..I really would be joking he even actually got upset a couple times.. I’m currently in the process of ending a friendship with I thought was y best friend.. We have been seeing each other for over 25 yrs off and on.. Steady for 5.. It’s a complicated relationship obviously and it gets worse any way you want to hear my story go ahead and let me know it’s definitely one to here and it’s still happening to me until I get the hell out here

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  7. aquaseanotes says:

    ok so maybe I like psychology too much, but one more thought:

    Gemini men usually have some source of stability in their life, and then in the rest of their lives, they are like a chaotic tornado. This is my opinion based on the Gemini men I have dated and have met.

    Either they have a stable career that they are dedicated to and proud of, but then they use their free time and money to play women and never settle down with a woman. If they have no career and just work at lame jobs, or maybe they are welfare, or maybe live with a relative, then they will be looking for a woman to settle down with.

    But either one of these kinds of Gemini man is going to cheat on whatever woman he is “with”. The ones who don’t have a decent job and who are always losing their job, or don’t make any money, they will look for an ugly woman or a woman who cannot find any other man, and they will tell that woman that they are in love with her and want to move in with her. They will give her the whole song and dance and make her think that they are in love with her. They will live off that woman, or at least make her pay for half of everything, while they struggle in their lame jobs. They will tell the woman that they can’t get ahead at their job and they don’t know why. That will go on for years. I have seen it. Of course, the Gemini man still talks to dozens of other women on the side, some of them will be ex-girlfriends who he keeps in touch with as “friends” and they are all on deck in case the current woman he’s living with kicks him out.

    The Geminis who do have a career, will be serial daters and will be seeing and talking to numerous women. They might talk like they are trying to settle down one day, but they really are not. Their career gives them the stability and money they need, so they will continue their playboy ways for decades. They will spend thousands of dollars to fly to Thailand, Mexico, Brazil or somewhere else where there are desperate and poor women, and they will have sex with those women for fun, and then come back to their job, and save up, and then go do that again.

    So in conclusion, whenever you meet a Gemini man, keep in mind that he is looking for one kind of stability, and if he thinks he’s going to get it from you, he will pull the wool over your eyes. But both kinds of Gemini men are cheaters.

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  8. Tootsie says:

    Everything that was said about the Gemini man is spot on! I’ve been with mine for 8 years and have finally had enough! I’m pulling the plug because I don’t even know who I am anymore. I feel more insecure and always stressed! It’s been such an emotional roller coaster! Can’t complain to him about anything, he’d consider it an “attack.” We don’t act like married couples. We don’t have joint accounts as couples should. He pays the rent (the past year) but I pay everything else plus I buy food. Most times, I don’t get to eat my own food that I bought with my own money cos they are parasites! When he buys, it’s for him alone. He doesn’t care if the kids and I have eaten or not. Even my parents said we have a really weird marriage. We are like room mates. He LOVES to hang out with his friends more than me. When I complain he makes me look like the crazy one. Took me out on a few dates, in 8 years only because I asked. I paid for most of our dates. He takes gas money from me, but I could never ask him for anything cos he “pays” rent (his words). He uses my credit cards until I get mad and take it back. Has cheated on me many times (3 I can prove). Has a bunch of females friends on FB and chats with them all the time. Zero respect for me. And he has mentioned to me how I can never find another man to do the “things he does for me.” Puleeeze! They are so overrated. They charm you with words, if you’re not a strong woman, they will F you up and mess you up mentally! They are only good for a one night stand (if that’s what you’re into) or better as a ‘drive by’. Keep it moving. I’ve lost 8 years of my life I can’t get back. Could have given someone else a chance and be happier. This is only half of what I’ve had to deal with. Long story! Be warned!

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  9. Tootsie says:

    The only thing he has going for himself is good looks and a good height. Otherwise, he is broke as hell!! Always borrowing money from friends or his poor old mom. When you spot him from a distance, he looks like the finest thing since table salt! Until you get to REALLY know him. When he does anything for you, expect him to always refer to that “one thing” he’s done. Doesn’t matter if you’ve done more, he’ll never admit to it. But his is a BIG deal! He’s a dreamer and has built many business with his mouth because they never materialize! Zero solid plans. We have a son together (wish we didn’t) cos now I have to deal with his ass for the rest of my life! He’s a total douche bag and always looking for the easy way out. Lies like its going out of style. I have zero trust and that’s why I’m leaving! When I stayed home with my son (didn’t work for a few months) . He didn’t call me for two straight months! No calls, no text whatsoever, unless I send him one. But as soon as I got a good job, he starts calling me like four times a day,and texting me stuff like “what’s up sexy.” Complete BS! They don’t mean that shit! Run and don’t look back cos they always come back. They are who they are!

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  10. Gregory L Phillips says:

    This is all bullshit! I am a gemini man and have never had any of the traits that I’ve seen spoken of in these blogs!

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    • Deborah says:

      Probably because your perfect….right, ive been out with 3 geminis and they had soo many of these traiits. So self obsessed and bordering on narcissism. Self awareness was never high on the agenda like their integrity and honesty.

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  11. Cat says:

    They DO always come back don’t they? I humored one for over a year who kept coming back with the flirty texts and lame behavior when I did spend actual time with him. When I cut him off, he came back after two months and upped the ante and actually called me to have some sincere talk about how special I was to him and how he wanted to spend more time with me and come visit me (I am 3.5 hours away). He said if anything is bothering me, I should let him know. I was kind of leery, but decided to give it one more chance and then he started sending me these bland pictures of himself at work. Then two days later, a friend of mine sends me a text asking what’s up with the same guy sending her pics of himself at work all week!

    That was it for me. I completely cut him off after that one. He tried to tell me he sends his guy friends those pics too. What a loser.

    Anyway, a few weeks ago, I noticed him in pictures with an acquaintance of mine who lives where I live (3.5 hours away)! He threatened to come visit me so many times and never stepped up to the plate and then here he is in my neck of the woods two months after I cut him off for good. I do not believe that woman he was with is dating him and no one else thinks that either that I know. While I can think it had nothing to do with me, I find that highly manipulative. One of my friends thought so too.

    While he can no longer talk to me and pull his shit, he can come down to my neck of the woods finally…..It kind of creeped me out.

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  12. Maira says:

    yeah..i agree with you..
    RUN!!!
    Any women who are dating a gemini…..run! and don’t look back,even if he makes you feel like a diamond of all diamonds,because you’ll be headed for feeling like a ordinary piece of glass that he loves to look at for his reflection.

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  13. Brandie Kiesey says:

    Holy sh*t! This is my husband to a tee. Well plus some but yeah I am only an object to him. A trophy he shows off when it suits him. Otherwise I am all that is wrong in his life. When in truth he has destroyed mine for 22 yrs!

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  14. Valerie Eskridge says:

    This is 100 percent correct. He gave me the greatest sex I ever had in my life! But turned around got me pregnant then he doesn’t want the baby . Fuck him I’m having it!-

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  15. Hans says:

    When I read all the comments here, it sickens me. Would the poor victim covert narcisists of you please stand up? Geminis like to mirror so there might acutally something wrong with you. That is called projection. So please give us all a break.

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  16. Sushmita ghosh says:

    Very true. Gemini man will make you feel like his princess and the other moment he will forget all his promises. He won’t even hear you. They will always have excuses to your pleadings and they are an expert to run off from situations that would fuck their ass. Beware of Gemini man as he will leave you completely broken after having some good fun with you. Only if he wants he would but absolutely no care and feelings to others. Yes they are good with emotionally dead people. They are allergic to human love. So Beware.

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  17. Janie says:

    Dear Agatha,

    thank you for writing the absolute truth. A Gemini man will be wonderful in the beginning, but you can be 100% sure, that you will end up with a totally different person. All they do is pretend. They are constantly wearing masks – they have one for you, one for their friends, one for their colleagues, one for the woman they cheat with, everybody. They will tell you what you want to hear in order to make you like them. They are weak and very easy to influence. They have no real personality, they just adapt to their surroundings and become like those few people around them they think are cool at the moment. But the mask falls off eventually, and it is always a terrible experience. Stay strong!

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  18. I have recently experienced some hoovering by a Gem. I’ve known him for at least 6 years now. We’ve stopped talking on and off. He reached out to me in early 2016, I told myself that I wasn’t going to let him hurt me like he did before. It took forever for me to feel normal and like myself again. My anxiety and depression was at its worst…When I first met him, he was a whole different person. Maybe after a year of knowing him and seeing his true self. I noticed that he still wasn’t ready to commit to me. He was still treating me like a girlfriend, buying me gifts and taking me out of vdays and introducing me to his friends and family. We were very sexually active together. Maybe 2 years along the line, he decides to cut me off because he was giving me the cold shoulder and I was concerned and wanting to know why… I had never been with a gem before. Sooo I didn’t know why he would go through these weird mood swings…I had no idea what I was getting myself into. In early 2016 he decides to add me on Facebook, he starts reeling me back in…Liking all of my pictures and leaving comments. I fall for it, we exchange numbers again and we text back and forth. Talk on the phone, we pretty much catch up. He apologizes for what he did, I had already forgave him. Something was off though, deep down inside something was telling me to not let him back in. Something was telling me that he hadn’t changed and he wasn’t planning on changing..i ignored it..i didn’t listen to my gut. We talked for 2 months before I decided to move back to my hometown to be closer to him. Where I lived it was at least 5 or 6 hours away. So I moved back to my hometown, things are going pretty smoothly, he’s texting me every morning, he would call or text me before going to bed…He would pick me up take me back to his place, I would drive and spend weekends with him. I was staying with my grandparents until I found a place of my own…while I was doing that, he was pressuring me into moving in with him…which I didn’t want to..I know he was only doing that just to hoover me in even more. He would tell me that he was ready to start a relationship with me. Which is something he never did before. When we first started talking years ago, he never talked about commitment with me. He also changed to subject before. Now that he’s back in my life he starts using his charm. Going on the 3rd month, I finally get a job closer to his city and an apartment…he would always down me and tell me that I wouldn’t be able to support myself while living alone. He always tried to make himself sound superior and above everyone else.. he always told me to always come to him if I needed financial help. Which I never did. We all know that they are never there for you when you really need them to be…I hate when they talk just to hear the sound of their voice..he meant none of it. I’d rather work for my own money. He always belittled me and made me feel small. The 4th month, I’m settled in my own place, making my own money and supporting myself. Out of nowehere he starts drifting off. He starts ignoring my text messages, he doesn’t call anymore. Not as often but he quits calling all together. He only calls texts me when he wants something from me. Sex, money, could be anything. Anytime I’d want to spend time with him, he would always make up an excuse…So I finally decide to cut off all contact. He’s blocked on everything. All of my social media. I realized that he can’t be changed, I can’t change him. It seems like the more you play hard to get and play mind games with them, the more they want you. Once they have won you over, they don’t want anything else to do with you..it’s honestly sickening. I’ve wasted 6 years of my life dealing with this asshole. I’ve turned down a few geminis who had the same traits. They were super sweet and “down to earth” lol. I cut them off quick. Lol. Didn’t really give them a chance. But hey that’s just me protecting myself. They aren’t relationship material. If you want something serious and long term. They aren’t the people for you. If you have dated a gem and you cut off all contact or broke it off. Block them on everything, they will try to reel you back in once they want something. Mine was only wanting sex from me.. that’s why he was telling me everything I wanted to hear. It was pretty obvious now that I think about it but I’m glad I don’t have to deal with his shit anymore. They drain your energy. And leave you emotionally fucked up. Let them go. Move on. I promise you’re better off.

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  19. Black Pen says:

    I hate the fact that I’m coming here to write my thoughts but I think fate who lead me here. Cause I was on a relationship with a Gemini guy for almost a year and he does exactly everything you wrote in this post. its like you are just talking about him. From being hot and cold to making false promises. He made me feel less confident about myself and I’m the most busy and independent woman on earth. I have a strong character, but his bahviour with me made me feel less worthy about myself. The relationship was on and off all the time, but he was the one that always tries to keep the relationship when I ignore him cause he knows deep down that he is guilty but he never confronted me with his mistakes. Until I read your post and I decided to cut him off for good cause I knew that I deserve better than this crap. And I’m thanking you for that. Believe me girls they are not worthy, they are just game players and they will exhaust you and tear your heart into peices and then they will leave you and move on when they are bored of you.

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